


one more tint

by JenLi



Series: Selection OC 6 [15]
Category: Selection OC
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-26
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:40:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26657542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenLi/pseuds/JenLi
Summary: Challenge 7 - Pink Room
Relationships: Jen Li/Arin Schreave
Series: Selection OC 6 [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1742209





	one more tint

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't wanna write this, but then Jen had to have important thought processes so screw her. This is your first look at Pink Room, but be warned! This is Jen's POV, and she actually misses most of the important parts that happen, so hit up Ester or Chris if you want the rest.
> 
> Also this was hell to reorder so if anything makes sense, I tried.  
> Also also, this includes the first Arin side RP.
> 
> TW: Lots of violence, there's character death, a lot of crying (mostly Jen's but some others this time!!), discussions of suicide, a rape threat, and then discussions of rape.

*So Jen just wanted to mind her OWN DAMN BUSINESS, and at this point in life she's done with people's bullshit more than usual. Being captured, unexpected as it was, was annoying because she was tired for FUCK'S SAKE and on her way to her room. She is angry yet resigned.

Idalia, Jen, and Leana are dragged into the Great Hall by five men—all dressed in black tactical gear with vests and a variety of weapons strapped to their bodies—they’re met with the sight of Kevin, Arin and Wylan (in that order) kneeling on the floor in front of a man in similar clothing, but with a red square attached to the black shirt on his bicep. the other man have green and blue. he is the only red.

Idalia has a cut lip and mean glare but she’s not fighting anymore. Leana is being dragged in there’s blood on his brow and she might have been threatened to shut her up.

WHEN Jen SEES IDALIA that pisses her off the most because fuck with Idalia and blood is going to spill. 

*Leana is being dragged in there’s blood on his brow and she might have been threatened to shut her up.* Whatever you are intending it won’t work like this.

*Jen definitely struggles against the men when they drag her in, not noticing the Boys until they force them to kneel. Her eyes widen at the sight, and she struggles for a moment when they bind and gag them, but realizing there's no way for this to end well for her by escaping, she lets them. She makes herself stay still in silent, staring straight ahead with the occasional glance at the Boys or Idalia or Leana. 

the man’s back is to the Selected, one hand on the hilt of a gun while the other is pressed against an earpiece in his ear, mumbling quietly. about seven other men surround the trio. A, K, and W are handcuffed. three of the seven attackers surrounding the trio are directly behind A, K, and W. guns pressed to their heads lest they move. the other four not far behind with their weapons trained at various entry points to the Great Hall

there, off to the side with no extra weapons except for a handgun at his hip, a man with the only yellow square on his bicep. the Selected will recognize him: the king of Swendway. he stares at Arin in distaste while Arin returns the look. at least until the Selected are shoved inside. then, his attention on them.

at the sight of Idalia being brought in, Wylan’s eyes widen and he squirms slightly. the attacker behind him kicks his back, making him hunch over slightly. he scowls and does nothing else except trying to meet her gaze.

one of the men who brought in Leana, Jen, and Idalia speaks up in an Illéan accent*

H: Sire, these three were nearby. As you asked. *the men holding on to the Selected shove them forward and tell them to get on their knees*

K(ing): *he glances at them and nods once. the man who addressed him does it merely out of courtesy as it’s clear who’s really running the show*

M(red man): *turns slightly and smiles. it’s friendly in an unsettling way* Right on time. *tilts his chin up* Restraints, please.

*the men who shoved the Selected start binding their wrists behind their backs in intricate knots and pulling out pieces of cloth to gag them*

M: *turns fully to face them, stepping closer as he examines each of their faces. tilts his head. his hair is dark, eyes a similar shade. skin fair. something is still wildly unsettling about his demeanor. begins with Jen, a hand reaching out to cup her chin roughly in his hand. She stiffens. Ian* A favorite, I’ve heard. *glances to Arin* I see the appeal. *Arin squirms in discomfort. her eyes widen in panic until her lets go of her. Jen remains stiff until he STOPS TOUCHING HER FRIENDS. Her gut remains a mess of nerves, especially as he talks to the Boys because this feels an awful lot like a mass execution. And if they're going down, she'll go with them.*

*M moves on. steps to Leana in the middle, not bothering to touch her. hums* The palace ought to be more careful with individuals like yourself. *he approaches Idalia, another sudden smile* And you. The treasonous athlete. *glances to Wylan, a smirk tugging at his lips* You both have excellent taste. *he makes sure to brush a lock of hair away from Idalia’s cheek for good measure before stepping back. a vein pops in Wylan’s neck as it takes every ounce of strength to not try and pounce in the leader’s direction*

King: *a heavy sigh, walking slightly past the three men tied up* Enough with the theatrics. We’ve been here long enough already.

M: *straightens, eyes still scanning the three Selected* Of course. *now he looks to A, K and W, walking to them* His Majesty is looking for his son. Question is, which one of you will be the first to squeal.

*M steps up to Kevin, a deep chuckle* Never the defector. *looks Wylan up and down, then rolls his eyes to the ceiling* Or the lackluster politician. *then he takes a slow step to Arin, leaning down slightly to meet him face to face* But maybe, just maybe, Illéa’s spineless prince could be our winner. *glances over his shoulder to the bound, gagged, and kneeling Selected* Thoughts?

*Jen doesn't look at him, keeping her eyes straight ahead. She knows how to plead the fifth*

Kev: *while M speaks Kevin remains stiff as he takes in the situation- just calculating. His eyes go over Leana, Idalia, and Jen with a softness that’s nearly imperceptible*

Arin: *At M’s question Arin involuntarily jerks back because he’s afraid of what will happen to them and his eyes are wide and full of fear*

M: *since he expected no reply whatsoever, he resumes his attention on the Boys* Let’s try our luck shall we? *takes a gun out of its hilt and walks over to the Selected again, but his eyes are on Arin. points it at Idalia’s head first. metal pressed to her temple Jen was doing JUST FINE until THAT DEAD BITCH presses the gun to Idalia's head, and it takes here approximately .00001 seconds to shift against her restraints and try to say something through the cloth even though she knows it won't end well for her and I assume they stop her. but she is p i s s e d* I know she’s not your catch of the day, but indulge me. Her life? Or the Swendish prince returned to his rightful place on the throne?

W: *THAT GUN TO HER HEAD. IT MAKES HIM SUCK IN A BREATH BEFORE EXHALING IT with a gasping “/please./“ he squirms again and the man behind him yanks his head back by his hair, making Wylan grimace*

M: *gaze sharpens* I’m in the middle of a conversation. A test of friendship, if you will. *raises his brows expectantly at Arin. a finger moves to the trigger* We’re at the edge of our seats, Your Highness.

*Arin looks at Idalia apologetically knowing his hands are fairly tied here- literally. He doesn't look at Wylan but he feels the shift in his body language. Arin swallows and looks M dead in the eyes* I have no idea what you're talking about.

*Leana never takes her eyes off M, hands clenching behind her back because she’s not ready to see anyone die.

M: *heaves a sigh and moves the gun away from her head. aims at Arin and shoots a few inches off to the side of his head with bone-chilling accuracy. the bullet will go whizzing by and the noise will startle everyone. Arin jumps at the sound of the gun going off but regains his composure and keeps his eyes on M. Jen flinches and shuts her eyes when the gun fires, too afraid of what she'll see when they open again.* I can appreciate a good or convincing liar. Unfortunately for you, you’re neither. I’ll ask again. *steps up to Leana and presses the gun against her forehead. Jen stiffens because even if she doesn't know her that well, her presence would be a missed one. M looks at Arin* /Where is Prince Theodor?/

K: *he’s growing impatient, shifting on his feet. eyes flitting from Arin to the leader. folding his arms over his chest*

W: *my man could only suddenly go lax in the attacker’s grip when the leader moves on from Idalia. his eyes close for a moment in relief*

A: * He says with more determination this time* I already told you I don’t know.

*Jen looses a breath when Arin speaks, eyes going over the Boys again. She forces herself to stay calm, keep staring forward, silent, not make this worse for anyone else*

W: *the attacker had shoved him forward, letting go of his hair to kneel.*

M: *he is losing patience. it’s evident when he looks to Leana and backhands her across the face. Leana bites the fabric on her mouth hard sounding like a groan. she’s cursing the man but the words are not coming out just sobs and hard breathing. Her nose is slightly bleeding. Jen flinches at that and keeps staring ahead, but her breathing quickens even further then turning on his heel to march over to Wylan but still addressing Arin* Wrong answer. *he doesn’t even ask again before firing the gun right next to Wylan’s ear. Jen closes her eyes again and keeps them shut when Wylan cries out, again afraid of what she'd see when she opened them* There goes his hearing. How about his life next?

W: *THE NOISE. IT MAKES HIM GRIMACE AND CRY OUT, doubling over at the ringing that’s now blaring in his left ear. he can hear nothing else. the pain of it makes his shoulder scrunch up against his ear with another groan*

A: *Arin jumps at the sound of the shot and even though he’s handcuffed he leans towards Wylan, accidentally bumping him as he tries to help him but realizes he can’t and leans upright again. He narrows his eyes at M and purses his lips. He thinks about his next move and what he’ll say but he holds off, sure that M will happily fill the shocked silence reverberating through the room*

M: *a muscle jumps in his clenched jaw and he kicks Wylan further into the ground for good measure—Wylan now is slumped on his side, voices muffled and far off and the pain still making his head POUND. shaking* Thank you for making your choice so clear.

*Jen has to keep forcing herself to stay calm, but every second that ticks by is testing her. She isn't completely sure whether she wants to scream or cry or what, but she can't. The dots have barely just connected as to who these people are, but there's too much information that she can only think about one thing: She needs these people alive. She needs her friends*

*Idalia’s breaths deepen as she immediately tries to get up. But her eyes were wide and she definitely said his name in alarm as he was lifting the gun, it’s just muffled by the cloth. Then she shot rings out*

*the attacker assigned to be behind Idalia reaches for her braid and yanks her back down to the ground on her knees, the other reaching for the gag tied around her face to tighten it around her mouth painfully. hisses in her ear, breath hot and uncomfortable* Try to move again and I take you into the next room. /Alone./ *straightens to his former position but he makes sure to keep a tight grip on her braid. The yank makes Idalia groan.*

*there’s no hesitation when M marches across the space between the two trios kneeling on the floor, back to the Selected. He grips Jen’s shirt by its front and heaves her up to a standing position, giving her no moment to recover as he shifts his hand to her nape with a painfully rough grip on her hair. Jen is half expecting him to come to her next, but she doesn't expect him pulling her up. She stumbles to where he wants her to, hitting the ground painfully hard when he forces her to kneel directly in front of Arin, but she just huffs out air as the only sound of pain. 

M drops to one knee, an arm draping across Jen’s chest (though it’s closer to her neck than anything) to hold her to him as he presses the gun to her temple. Her eyes bore into Arin, a mixture of pleading and apologies for this. M cocks it. practically spits out his words* I’ve never known a man to resist the truth for his beloved. The question is *He slowly drags the muzzle of the gun along Jen’s hairline and down the side of her face until it’s pressed underneath her chin, pointing up into her head. Jen closes her eyes, desperate to not let herself go back to /him/. he grins, teeth glinting. presses his nose to her cheek and tightens his grip around her until she begins to choke* Do you love her, Prince Arin? *he mumbles against Jen’s skin. Jen focuses on the lack of air and not the words, still keeping her shut as he mumbles against her like that. then he leans back slightly to meet Arin’s gaze* Or will she die for your pride?

A: *when M goes to grab Jen Arin sucks in a breath but tries to remain calm and does his best to keep his expression hard but neutral while he fights off wincing as Jen is dragged across the floor. When she’s forced to kneel in front of him he falters and his eyes widen as he stares at her- not willing to look at M then he leans forward towards her when he begins to choke her* Jen. *he gasps*

*Jen’s eyes open and she just looks at him with eyes that say /I'm sorry/ even while she can't breathe. He was a nice last thing to see if that was it*

M: *he motions for the attacker to pull Arin back by the top of his hair. then he stands suddenly with Jen, arm loosening slightly around her neck so she can breathe a bit better. that wasn’t his intention. simply the result of him moving them to stand once again. Jen gasps out air when the grip on her neck is loosened, already feeling a little light-headed. His back goes more straight and he looks up at M with a more serious and thoughtful expression that’s borderline indifferent when he yanks Jen up. He keeps the gun under her chin however, then tilts his chin in the direction of the attackers on Idalia and Leana. they pull out their own guns and hold them to the back of their heads and M grins once more. he uses the muzzle of his gun to remove the gag from around Jen’s mouth, I & L’s attackers removing the gags from their mouths as well. Jen coughs a little, trying to hunch over, though he wouldn't let her get very far.* Since the best your sovereign can come up with is “Jen” *he repeats over dramatically* then I’m giving the rest of you the opportunity for your last words. Let’s hope they’re more constructive than what Arin had to say. *he’s about to pause to let the Selected speak when Wylan interrupts*

W: *by now he’s managed to turn himself slightly on his side toward’s Arin’s direction a bit, but his attacker yanks him back up to kneeling and punches Wylan in the ear that was injured. he looks to Arin with some desperation after he cries out then back to Idalia, who screams out for him. Wylan says* Arin, /please./

M: *he raises his brow in Wylan’s direction* Oh? *eyes land on Arin once more* You have until the count of three before I splatter their pretty little brains all over the floor. One *he waits* /Two./

A: *He narrows his eyes again-knowing that if M shoots them then he loses leverage... but also he could still do it anyway for the fun of it. He doesn’t look at Jen, or over at Wylan who’s pleading or anyone else in the room. Just M. Then in a clear and much stronger voice then just moment before he says* He’s not here.

*Idalia blurts out* At least we die knowing no one in this room deserved a crown.

*The gags gone, Jen realizes this could be the last thing she ever says, so she racks through her brain for /something/, but everything seems inadequate. So many things, but none she wanted to taint with this night, she simply keeps her eyes on Arin, even if he's not looking at her. After he speaks for the last time, she says* Arin. *She says it just to say it, not to beg or plead, but maybe with a little hope that he understands all the things she never got the opportunity to say*

*Leana starts speaking, but Jen's still staring at Arin, not really hearing anything the other girls are saying, stuck in her head and thinking a million things at once. So many things she never got to do. She would never get married. She would never have kids. She would never finish painting that wall.  _ I don't want to die. _ *

King: ENOUGH! *he roars, his deep tone echoing throughout the room. Jen jumps out of her thoughts, her eyes closing tightly again* If this brat won’t give it up, I’ll find my son myself. *he takes out his gun and cocks it, aiming it at Arin’s head. Her eyes fly open when the king takes out his gun and cocks it.* And take out Illéa’s next king while I’m at it. a smug smile tugs at his lips It’s been a pleasure. Now—

A: *Arin closes his eyes at the feeling of the gun against his head and takes a deep breath because that’s that. He doesn’t want to see the look on Idalia, Leana, or Jen’s faces*

*As M pulls Jen away to let the king stand in front of Arin and shoot, Jen starts struggling a little out of desperation, whispering "No" and "Please" and something else that maybe only M could hear, her eyes going to the king and Arin.*

*a gunshot. piercing, startling. /Too loud./ Jen shuts her eyes and whispers one more time.  _ I love you. _ Words she should have told him but never did. Words she had so many opportunities to say, but they hadn’t come to mind until right when she would lose him.  _ Always too late.* _

M: *he waits a few beats before speaking once more. moves his gun back to underneath Jen’s head, sighing a bit while the hot muzzle presses into her skin. Then after a moment, it’s just cold. She keeps her eyes shut, tears starting to pour* Hope that wasn’t too much fun for you. *He says, but to who she doesn’t know* I suppose I can say now that I could care less about Prince Theodor. But in the interest of, well, /my/ best interest, we’ll be returning him to his home country soon enough.

*More silence. M drags Jen to her spot, and she stumbles back into place on her knees that would surely bruise if they ever got the opportunity to. She hunches over as sobs begin to wrack her body. Everything begins to block itself out. M’s word, the footsteps. The wheezing across from them* 

*She jumps again at the second shot, and keeps her eyes closed as she chokes out sobs, not wanting to know who the source of the coughing was, who else she loved was dead. Wylan probably. The first person she’d opened up to. The sweet boy her best friend was so in love with, even if she never said so. So much light in his eyes. So much love they had for each other that they would never get to give*

*And then there was Arin. A man she’d somehow grown so fond of. One she loves, and for how long, she had no idea, but in that moment when she feels the loss down to her core, she knows. She knows this feeling in her gut isn’t normal. She knows the way she finds herself staring or thinking about him isn’t out of fondness anymore. It was before Ian, before everything that had happened, and the way he’d held her that night through anything and everything. Something had changed, and she didn’t want to just be okay anymore. She wanted to be okay with him, but none of that mattered now because she hadn’t figured it out sooner, and Arin was dead without him ever knowing she loved him. Soon, she would be dead without him telling her too.*

*So little time she had with this realization before he was taken from her. She wishes she could’ve held him knowing this just once. One single time.*

*Her head throbs from the sobs wracking through her body, but she can’t stop. It all just pours out at once with nothing to fix it. Nothing would. People were going to die. People were already dying. Arin was either dead or dying in front of her, and she can’t even open her eyes.*

*And she doesn’t until she hears a cry from someone, a voice she’s not familiar with. “Pappa?” he says, and Jen doesn’t process until a second longer than it should. Prince Theodor. Arin was lying, and she almost is angry he died out of pride, but then they start beating Theodor, and she suddenly can’t close her eyes even as his broken sobs fill the room.*

*She does see things, however, out of her peripheral vision, one of them being Wylan. Alive. Not okay but alive. Her gaze follows Theodor’s to the dead body on the floor, but it’s not Arin. The second shot, she realizes, was... the King of Swendway, obvious by the body, and she doesn’t give herself to think about how bad this will be because for all she knows, this is it. That accounts for one, but in an effort to avert them from Theo, her eyes settle on the spot Arin would be. She sees Kevin's body first. Kevin, lying in front of Arin, a bullet wound in his chest. She can’t tell if he’s still alive. It's not Arin. Her gaze goes up and settles on a very not okay but a very alive Arin, and she lets out another shaky breath. Not happy because Kevin isn't okay. Kevin, the mediator. She hurts for him, but Arin is /alive./ She felt it once and immediately knows she doesn't want to feel it again.

M: *he looks at Theo as if he’s merely an annoying tick that needs to be squashed. turns slightly to the attackers holding Wylan, Arin, and the Selected* Gather them up in front of the thrones. Be quick about it.

*They do as they’re told. Kevin’s body left behind as Arin and Wylan are dragged further back to kneel in front of the thrones. Arin tries to fight, kicking and thrashing as he’s pulled from Kevin to no avail. Jen’s breathing heavy, keeping her eyes on Arin even as they're dragged toward the throne, her mind echoing /He's alive./ Wylan's alive. So is Idalia. So is Leana. Even though she feels like she knows what's going on, that's enough. Kevin made his sacrifice. No one else should have to die alone.

*Jen is tossed next to Arin, likely half falling onto his knees. Wylan’s attacker shoves him so hard he ends up lying on his side. Idalia is tossed next to him. Leana in the middle of them all. Jen takes a moment to process when she's thrown to the ground painfully hard, the cold floor a nice contrast to everything else. Her eyes stay on Arin's*

*besides the attackers holding onto Theo, the rest form a half circle around the group of hostages, guns trained on each body. M at the center, though the gun in his hand hangs by his side for now. he offers them each a smile* Not the day you expected, no? Nor the ending. It’s been... well, not a pleasure. But this will be mine. *he steps up to Arin, head tilted* Any final words for your friends here? Begging? I do love when they beg. Warms my heart

A: *Arin glares up at M, with that silent reservation from before vanishing. If he’s going to die he may as well say what he wants.* Faen deg. Du kan gå till helvetet. *Then, Arin’s eyes go to Jen and all he can do is shake his head and whisper* I’m sorry.

*At the words, it takes only a second to make the decision before she leans toward him as close as she can manage, ignoring the handcuffs and the yelling and her bruised knees and the blood splattered on his face and finally whispers something back she regretted missing so much before. Last words. Her second chance.* I love you.

*She settles back onto the floor, pressing her cheek against the coolness. She doesn't want to die, but if it's surrounded by people she loves, then there were worse ways to go. She closes her eyes. /Not alone./*

*Arin’s eyes widen and when Jen pulls away he watches her for a long moment with the world's saddest smile and the says softly* How does next Friday sound? *She hadn’t expected a response.*

*Jen opens her eyes again to look at him, huffing out a small laugh as she starts crying again, giving him the best smile she can as she nods and whispers* Yes. *Little secrets only they know. Not a single other soul. At least she would die with that knowledge, and if she could take his hand, she would.*

M: *raises a brow, clicking his tongue at Arin’s Swendish. ignores what he said to Jen because he could honestly care less* Far too crass for a royal. Of course, you’re Illéan. You must think you’re brave. *he leans in close to make sure Arin can see every ounce of hatred in his eyes, muttering* I’m happy to remind you that you’re not and /never will be./ *takes a thumb and smears the blood from Kevin down Arin’s cheek—making Arin shudder involuntarily while Jen’s words replay in his head—holding his thumb up when he’s done in Arin’s line of vision so he can get a good look. Jen simply watches helplessly, her mind racing with thoughts she wouldn’t be proud of later, but if she could put a bullet in this man’s head right now, she would feel no remorse.* Let this serve as proof of that. And a fuck you too, Your Highness. *then he brings the butt of the gun down on Arin’s head so hard it renders the prince unconscious, his body slumping to the floor. 

*Jen can help but cry out at the strikes, tears streaming down her face, but suddenly she feels much stronger than she was before. She raises herself up as far and scoots as close to him as she can manage, wishing she wasn’t cuffed and bound so that she could at least hold him, tell him that things were going to be okay even if they weren’t, even if he couldn’t hear her say so. At least she told him. At least they both could die knowing something good.*

*M steps back with a smirk and joins the lineup. raises his gun, and Jen looks from Arin’s peaceful face to the monster poised in front of them* He's a better man than you will ever be.

M: And yet *he muses in reply to Jen* who’s lying unconscious on the floor, useless? *He shakes his head with a smirk, and now all Jen can feel is anger burning through every inch of her body. Even through the tears and the pain and the rapid beating of her heart, she lets herself see. She looks down at Arin and wishes so much it didn’t have to end like this, that she could one day tell him everything he meant to her.  _ Next Friday. _ She glances to her left at Idalia and Wylan, who lie there next to each other, and even with just that you could tell. You could feel the love emanating, and it isn’t fair. So much time they had left suddenly taken away. Her best friends gone in the blink of an eye. And then she looks to Leana, the girl she’d sat with nearly every day at meals and never held a full conversation with. She never paid attention to her like she should, and now it’s too late.*

*She glances down at Arin again, at his face that she wishes she could just touch one more time, that she didn’t realize she would miss so much until this very moment. At least she has it now. All the things they can’t have, but at least he’s right here. She meets M’s gaze, ready.*

M: On my count, gentleman. One. T— 

*There’s a pause, and he stops counting. Close gunfire erupts outside the room, making a line appear between M’s brows. more, again. his hand flexes around the handle of the gun and then there’s a voice speaking into his earpiece. he grunts in frustration and drops his gun, motioning to his men. Jen can only watch with red eyes, but she still can’t process what’s going on. She no longer stares down a barrel of a gun. There’s just nothing.* Time to move out. *M looks over his shoulder at Prince Theo who had gone eerily still, gaze trained on the floor. M waves a hand* Move him with the others. Can’t afford to lug him around. *Theo is tossed on the ground in front of the selected and boys. the men, with their guns pointed at the main entrance, start to walk backwards towards another exit. M does the same. he makes sure to flash another smile in the group’s direction* Keep an eye out for part two. Should be /thrilling./ 

*they’re gone in seconds, and she just sits there and stares after them, their breaths the loudest thing breaking the silence of the eerily quiet room. She can barely stop and consider the fact that they’re alive.*

T: *It takes Theo a bit to even move, pushing himself up with trembling muscles. finally tearing his eyes away from the dead body of his father. he looks terrible and yet, he crawls over to the group I’m sorry, I’m so sorry *he whispers to no one and everyone. Jen doesn’t care. She doesn’t care who he is or care for the apologies. They don’t matter.*

*He moves to Leana first, checking her handcuffs with shaking and realizing he needs a key for all of them. swallows, looking around. he pushes himself to stand with a wince and half stumbles over to the dead guard. falls to his knees and begins to search his pockets, doing his best to avoid looking at the face.*

*Jen takes the opportunity to turn back to Arin and just look down at him, eyes going over every drop of blood on him. Kevin's blood splattered and wiped on his cheek, so much he’ll wake up to, but he  _ will _ wake up. Theo finds what he needs and again stumbles back to the group, to Leana first. uses the small key he found to unlock her handcuffs. goes to Wylan. 

*Before Theo is done freeing Wylan, Idalia finally lets out one pained, loud, terrible cry and she leans forward, forehead to the floor, hands still bound. Tears coming down without anything holding back now but she manages to be quiet after. It’s just that everything hurts in more than one way.*

*Jen shuts her eyes and heaves a breath for her friend, but she knows words won't help, so she stays quiet. She understands she just needs to cry.*

*It takes a bit longer to get Idalia free because Theo can’t stop his hands from shaking, mumbling whispered, desperate apologies as he goes on. When Theo frees Idalia’s hands, they simply go to the sides of her head so she can hide more, fingers lacing with some of her hair. Jen can only offer a silent thought.  _ I’m sorry, Dal. _ *

*Theo gets to Jen, and she whispers a thanks, absentmindedly rubbing her aching wrists, but she shifts back to Arin. Her hands are shaking when she touches him again, first at his shoulders and then going to his cheek to wipe off that smear of Kevin's blood off his cheek, but then she moves to help him with Arin, needing to turn him slightly to get his cuffs off. She barely even registers the gunfire but tenses at it, just staring down at Arin and brushing a hand over his hair until he starts to stir. She sends a thanks up to Heaven if there’s anyone listening.*

A: *he groans. then as he comes more to, he lets out a whimper of pain. he rubs at his head with the back of his hand, not opening his eyes just lays there. then he rolls a little towards jen and murmurs something too soft to hear*

She lets out a shaky breath as she starts crying again because he's alive. They're alive. When he murmurs, she simply leans down and starts to whisper* It's okay. They're gone. We're okay. *Even though she knows they're not*

A: *he reaches for Jen and tries to soothingly hold her back but he’s too weak and dizzy and confused. He sways a bit as a wave of nausea hits him*

*Jen smiles as much as she can but shakes her head because he shouldn't move too much. She sits up a little more and looks around. Idalia crying. Wylan obviously not okay. Theo coughing up blood. Leana not good. Arin in bad shape. They need help*

*A burst of noise as the doors are kicked in. men shouting, all wearing helmets and holding up guns as they clear the room of any more assailants. despite the similar black tactical uniforms, the words and colors on their chests are clear: they’re Illéan and there to help.*

A: *Arin sits up as quick as he can- first startled by the noise but for a moment his hand goes to his head where the gun struck him before he leans over next to him and vomits.*

*once everything is clear and a few rush over to the group—a couple others checking the king, the guard, and Kevin—one of them shoots their gun out the door, taking down an attacker.*

*the gunshot echoes in the room and Jen’s eyes snap to Wylan's when he cries out, her heart pained. She just needs this to stop. Wylan falls to his side and both hands presses against his ears. his expression scrunched in pain* Please stop *he whispers. the men surround the group and immediately begin to ensure their safety. it’s chaotic but efficient and they’re /safe./*

A: *he looks back at jen when he’s done, still swaying, then through groggy confusion, he murmurs* I made a mess. *he turns away again and vomits once more*

*Jen just gives him another sad smile* It's okay. *And she keeps a hand on his back when he hunches over again until she looks up at the men surrounding them and simply says* Help them.

*The Illéan men make sure to kneel by each person slowly, assessing and asking if it’s okay to help. Theo and Arin to be the worst off of the group and Theo quickly nods his assent to being helped by someone, his arm slung over his shoulders as he’s carried away. another asks if he can do the same for Arin*

A: *he groans and shakes his head, still feeling ill. He takes deeps breaths to try and keep his nausea at bay then finally he groans and when he sees everyone else with soldiers nearby he motions to Jen* Help her first. I’m fine. *narrator: it was a deadass lie- he was not fine*

*Jen just watches each person, inspecting the soldiers, listening, thinking. One comes to Leana aid, quiet and very careful. softly asking questions. two to Idalia and Wylan. But she quickly turns back to Arin’s soldier and shakes her head. No one needs to worry about her. Compared to them all, she was okay* I’m not injured. Take him.

*Before she can even process or say her goodbye, Arin is whisked off to the infirmary with Theo, leaving Wylan and the girls to deal with the aftermath alone*

**Timeskip (Ester has the aftermath and Jendalia angst go ask her to post) - Side Arin 1**

*So I guess this can take place after midnight, so technically the 27th. Jen would not be doing too hot, but are any of them? Definitely worse than after Ian, but she'd be covering it up by just doing a lot. Pretending. Not eating or sleeping until she can't do it anymore. Nights are the worst, so she goes to the kitchen and eats on the counter to cope. Straight out of the pail. Chocolate, same as last time. She wears a hoodie and shorts and socks. There are earbuds in her ear while she watches Gossip Girl on her phone. Her back would be to him when he came in*

*Arin tiredly trudges to the kitchen after having asked some guards where Jen was. When he sees her sitting on the counter he slowly goes to the liquor cabinet and grabs a bottle of scotch. He unscrews the cap and meanders over to where Jen is sitting and leans against the counter opposite to her, not saying anything as he just watches her watch her show and eat ice cream*

*She keeps her eyes on her phone, shifting only occasionally to either take a bite or take her phone again. She probably wouldn't glance back usually, but it's hard to focus these days, though she wasn't exactly planning on seeing anyone there, so she starts choking on the bite she has in her mouth, jumping worse than usual. One of her earbuds falls out*

*he raises his eyebrows at her and muses in a flat tone* I should have remembered the bell. *he holds the bottle to his lips and chugs a few shots worth of scotch before he looks her over then nods a little seeing that she's on one piece*

*Realizing who he is, she presses pause and turns slightly toward him, bending one leg and hoisting it onto the counter. She's silent for a moment, still clutching the ice cream, one earbud in her ear though nothing plays* Maybe you should've.

*he scowls a bit at that and takes another swig before he huffs. Arin shakes his head and glances around because it seems the kitchen didn't escape unscathed either. Then he looks back to her* You know what today is?

*Her eyes follow his gaze, not really sure where he's getting at. She notices then the scotch and frowns a bit, but she won't mention it* Not really.

*he takes a glance at his watch then looks back to her* It's September 27th. *he tilts his head to the side*

*She meets his eyes and gives a brief nod* I guess it is.

*he looks down at the bottle, already having lost his train of thought and he appears to read over the label*

*She keeps frowning when he doesn't say anything, not liking the air between them. She presses her lips together* You look awful.

*he heaves a tired breath and looks up at her and there's just this lack of warm or spark that's usually there even when arin is mad or upset* Thank you, I try. *he takes another longer sip*

Any time. *She turns away then, taking another bite of ice cream as she stares straight ahead, stiffening because she doesn't know what to do. This is different and not in a good way*

*he sets the bottle on the counter with a thud and looks her over then nods* You look better.

*She still doesn't look at him, just takes another bite* Do I?

Somewhat. *he shrugs the looks back at the bottle, then looks back at her with a grim expression*

I guess that's good. *She takes another bite as she thinks that over. She can imagine she looks better than the last time he’d seen her. Teary and bruised and crying.  _ I love you, _ she’d said. She doubts he’ll mention it.*

*he crosses his arms and purses his lips. /good/ none of them are "good" and certainly not him*

*She looses a breath, closes her eyes for a moment. This isn't /them./ she turns back to him* Are you... *She trails off, looking for the right word but not coming up with one*

*he gives her a blank stare* Am I what?

*She averts her eyes, deciding it's just best not to finish that sentence* How's your head?

Fractured. *he states simply, still with little emotion behind his words* But I guess I should consider myself lucky.

*Her breathing is getting a little heavier now, trying not to think too much about that night and failing* Maybe.

It’s what everyone says. All the doctors and nurses and the /advisors/. *there’s clear disdain when he says “advisors”*

*Her voice lowers a bit, eyes going to him* But they weren't there, were they?

*They didn’t see their friends, people they loved lined up to die. They didn’t see people get murdered right in front of them. They had no idea the things they just lived through.*

*a look that is somewhere between lost and confused crosses his face and he mumbles* I wish I weren’t here.

*She swallows at the confession, ignoring the nagging disappointment and sadness because she understands* Where would you rather be?

*his eyes meet hers and he says nothing because he’s certain she knows exactly what he means so there’s no point in saying it*

*When he doesn't answer, she just pauses for a moment before saying* Yeah, well, me too.

*he just blinks and breathes in and out, looking at her* How’s Friday?

*She doesn't like where this conversation is going, really really doesn't, but she doesn't refute him* Still free.

Good. Wear black. *he eyes the scotch another time and murmurs* Safety first.

*She sighs and pulls her other leg up before scooting across the counter, now facing him with her legs hanging off. She holds out a hand for the scotch* Can I?

*he looks back to her and frowns because he feels like by now she knows he doesn’t like sharing and his body stiffens. But then he reaches down and picks up the bottle. He takes another long drink then hands it over*

*She takes the bottle and immediately takes a drink, wincing at the taste* You know *she begins, not meeting his eyes* he liked when I drank before he fucked me. *She takes another sip, closing her eyes for a moment* Said I was easier like that. *She hands the bottle back, a small smile on her face, but it's humorless* Funny thing to be upset about now, I think.

*his jaw tightens when she says that. And he doesn’t find it funny at all. When she hands the bottle because he visibly hesitates* You mean when he raped you. *arin stares at the bottle then winces before he takes another drink*

*She sighs and shrugs, that small smile still on her face unsettling. She doesn't meet his eyes as she hums* I forget I call it that now. *She leans back a little, propping up her arms on the counter and closing her eyes* I haven't slept for days, but I passed out in the library today, just for a little while. On a couch. *Her eyes go to his* You wanna know what I dreamt about?

Is it the same thing that I’d dream about if I could fall asleep? *he keeps his eyes on hers for a moment before looking down at his wrists, where there are still the faintest marks from the handcuffs*

*A slight shake of her head. Her eyes follow his to his wrists* No, we were back there again in that room, but instead of... *pauses, searching for something but coming up with nothing* Instead of that man touching me, instead of that man about to kill you, it was Ian. *She swallows after saying the name, eyes going back to meet his* I'm not sure it would've been worse or better.

*he’s quiet as he thinks that over, remembering what happened in the room. But he still doesn’t look up* And did he kill me?

No. *Her voice is a bit darker* He killed me first. At least, I think he did. I woke up when he pulled the trigger. *She pauses again* I remember feeling the same as last time too.

*he takes a deeps breath and actually laughs a little- not with any real amusement* It doesn’t go away, does it? *he looks up then* This is the rest of our lives.

*She keeps staring at him, studying his face and eyes for something, anything* I'm just... grateful I got a second chance. Nothing feels okay right now, but... *She sucks in a breath as she thinks back* I didn't want to die.

I’m glad you got a second chance. You deserve one. *he picks up the bottle again and watches the way the scotch sloshes around* I wish I could have had one too. *there’s no hesitation this time as he takes another drink- something uncharacteristic of him given how much he has always hated sharing things*

*She watches him drink for a long moment, and when she speaks again, her voice is quiet* You do have one.

*he looks at her with a different sort of sadness then and slowly shakes his head* I don’t think so.

*Her voice is the same level of quiet, but her eyes are softer* Why?

*he shakes his head again* Because.... *he stops and takes a deep breath* because... the universe seems to always be able to find a way to... I don’t know. *he sighs*

*She watches him, listening, saying nothing until he stopped talking. She considers what to say, but there's nothing. She knows there isn't* Arin...

*he frowns and closes his eyes* Please don’t “Arin” me. I just can’t do this right now. Not with everything else going on.

*She retreats back a little, her eyes going to her lap* I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to. I just...

*he opens his eyes and looks at her* I know. *he pushes off the counter and takes a step towards her but still keeps the distance* I’m just not in a place to appreciate it at the moment... for a lack of a better way to put it.

*She gives a nod, eyes still trained on her lap, obviously not okay, but no one is anymore* Right.

*he purses his lips* You know how you always want me to tell you that it will be okay? *he keeps looking at her even if she won’t look at him* I’ve always believed that when I’ve told you. *he’s quieter then* but this... *he trails off as he loses his train of thought*

*Her eyes stay on her lap for a long moment, but she was listening, thinking about too many things. When he trails off, she very slowly holds out her hand for him, still not looking, swallowing down the fear of rejection. Things were different now. No guarantees of anything*

*he stares at her outstretched hand for a long moment then shakes his head because he knows what will happen if he takes it. He says softly* I’m sorry. I can’t.

*She pulls her hand back, still not looking at him, and looses a breath. She tries to ignore the sting of rejection, her fingers coming up to play with the strings of her hoodie, but it doesn't work* Okay. *Her words still quiet* I'm... glad you're alive. *She shifts on the counter, already moving back to her side* of the counter where the ice cream lay* I'm gonna go. Enjoy your drink.

*he steps back from her and just gives her a tired shake of his head* You were here first. I’ll go. *he picks up the the bottle from the counter and doesn’t say anything more before he takes a few steps in the direction of the door*

It will be okay. *She says it as she hops to the ground and pulls her hood over her head, putting back in one earbud. Her tone leaves no room for argument. Just tired* One /victim/ to another. *Her eyes stay on the ice cream as she picks up her spoon again, leaning onto the counter* Don't do anything stupid. * _ Don’t hurt yourself more than they already have. _ *

*he stops and looks like he might turn around for a moment but then he just keeps walking, leaving her all alone in the kitchen once more*

**Author's Note:**

> Next up: The Attic


End file.
